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The Old Man and The Shoe(s)

They often say ‘opposites attract.’ I don’t really know who ‘they’ are. But, if that saying is true, MTM and I personify it.

Take shoes. I worship them, overflowing our shared closet with so many pairs that it is hard to find room for all my other clothing, hats and handbags. Forget MTM’s stuff altogether.

When I buy a new pair of shoes (usually online these days, because I have no patience for shopping and trying on), I put them on my feet IMMEDIATELY. Even if I am wearing my pajamas or a ripped t-shirt when the UPS man knocks on my door. My feet cannot WAIT to be caressed and kissed by the shine of new footwear. I am a whore for a different pair of shoes.

Then, there’s MTM.

On my birthday weekend, I forced him – FORCED him – to buy not one, but two new pairs of shoes. Hundreds of dollars worth of leather for his triple E foot. He brought the sneakers home in our suitcase. The black dress shoes were delivered to his office last week.

As of right now, he has worn them…………..NOT ONE TIME. They languish away in the closet, next to shoes whose sides have pulled away from the soles and whose soles have fallen apart entirely, all shoes that MTM still wears every day.

I feel so sorry for those poor, neglected shoes (I mean the NEW ones) that I want to wear them, to show them that they have found a home with someone who will appreciate them. If I wouldn’t fall over because of their width, I would do it. I would skip around this city and break them in. Show them off. Let them know I am proud to call them mine.

Only they’re NOT mine. They are MTM’s. He just doesn’t know how to love shoes like I do.

But, he sure does know how to love me.

Too Much is Just Enough: NEW SHOES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

43 Comments Post a comment
  1. I gotta be with MTM on this one. I may have 3 pairs of shoes? And I usually wear the same ones over and over. It s kinda like underwear, why wear something new when the old stuff is so comfortable?

    And remember, you made him buy them. It was arranged marriage. At gunpoint. Can’t blame him for not feeling warmly towards them.

    April 4, 2011
    • There was no gun involved…………..

      April 4, 2011
      • OH GAWD, you said the word again…. LOL

        April 4, 2011
      • That was a _figurative_ gun. No need for you to get all excited James.

        April 4, 2011
      • mtm #

        I think what you meant to say, Lou, was: “Wait, before you let the other shoe drop, I think we are missing…..

        April 4, 2011
    • mtm #

      Careful you don’t shoot (shoe-t?) yourself in the foot!

      April 4, 2011
      • That would be just toe-ible. You are such a heel.

        April 4, 2011
      • mtm #

        Next you’re going to say I have no soul….or maybe that I am tongue-tied? I certainly don’t want to be your arch-enemy!

        April 4, 2011
      • You better watch out or you will get us both booted out of here! That would leave us without a leg to stand on.

        April 4, 2011
      • Andra better get in here and show what a vamp she can be. She’ll leave the two of you with a few welts…

        April 4, 2011
      • You think she’ll leave us flat-footed? We don’t knee’d that!

        April 4, 2011
      • Lou Mello #

        I think we are missing the key point of the blog…check the title again….”the OLD MAN”. Oy vay, how does she get away with this one? Will she plead nursery rhyme insanity? Does she even have a soul? Such a clever lady. :)

        April 4, 2011
      • I have to leave my slippers at the door on this one, lest I foul the carpet. (And that is a bad pun. Is it even a pun?)

        April 4, 2011
  2. Lou Mello #

    For men, shoes are strictly utilitarian, we wear what we have to wear because they work and we only need one at a time for that. Running shoes for working out and running, yard work shoes are old running shoes that have lost their exercise mojo. Casual shoes for the office and weekend running around and one pair of dress shoes for black or brown occasions. I have the same pair of dress shoes that I wear with a tux or a suit or any dress up occasion. They are 19 years old and go back in their little shoe bag as soon as I walk in the door and take them off. I also have a pair of brown dress up shoes that are at least 15 years old and probably get worn twice a year.

    MTM hasn’t put them on yet because there is no need to, when they are required to be worn, he will wear them.

    Men and shoes….one pair is just enough.

    April 4, 2011
    • Now, MTM left the dress shoe store saying he still needs a new pair of brown ones…………Obviously, one pair is not just enough for him.

      (I’m certain that is my fault……..)

      April 4, 2011
      • Lou Mello #

        Yep, we need one black and one brown pair of dress shoes and we’re good for 20 years.

        April 4, 2011
  3. I like shoes however because I was “blessed” with such big feet I have a hard time finding any that fit and are comfortable. So I have 2 pair right now and they are closed shoes and one is my tennis shoes. James on the other hand has more shoes than i do. However, because he has a club foot, he wears shoes down a lot faster than most people so he tends to go through them a lot faster. So usually every 6 months he needs to get another pair of dress shoes.

    April 4, 2011
    • Katy, dear, the one I love and cherish. You NEED to change your avatar to reflect how beautiful you are. OK? Need some help? I am here for you. We are here for you. Just ask. (giggle)

      April 4, 2011
    • Aw. Yes, Katy. Please let us see your lovely face.

      Thank you for coming to lunch last week. With so many people, I never feel like I get to spend time with everyone, especially when they aren’t right in front of me.

      One of the links on the post today goes to a site just for people with wide feet. I don’t know if you mean big as in wide or big as in size, but that might be a new resource for you to check out.

      April 4, 2011
  4. I’m one of those women who isn’t really a shoe person, and I have a terrible time finding dress shoes that don’t have high heels. However, I did buy a couple of pairs in the last month or so, and I need to practice walking in them.

    April 4, 2011
    • mtm #

      Us guys are so lucky….First, we will never have to buy a pair of shoes that we would have to ‘practice walking in.’ Second, we are lucky that our ladies are eager and willing to do so!

      April 4, 2011
    • Sometimes, MTM, practicing walking in a new pair of shoes simply means breaking them in. It doesn’t have to mean instruments of torture for the feet designed to elongate our legs so that men will lust after us.
      :)

      April 4, 2011
    • Vera, are your new shoes heels?

      April 4, 2011
      • Both pairs. I feel like I’m probably too old to learn.

        April 4, 2011
      • We’re never too old to learn anything.

        April 4, 2011
  5. I can see that while I was snoring my life away this morning my bride was on here responding to the blog post this morning. :) Hi honey, nice to see you here! Speaking of buying shoes I went to payless this weekend and bought a pair of black dress shoes that seem to last me much longer than the shoes I would buy at Wallyworld. I now have two pairs of dress shoes that I will alternate through the week, one pair of tennis shoes for Planet Fitness, one pair of black boots for yard work and one pair of brown comfy slip on shoes for quick trips to the corner store or out into the yard. That makes 5 pairs of shoes. I guess, for a man, that is excessive. I did throw away 3 pairs of shoes just recently because they were old and worn out and just taking up space. Katy almost fainted when I suggested I get rid of them. LOL

    April 4, 2011
    • It sounds sensible to me, James. Having more than one pair of dress shoes means you have options to suit your mood and your outfit, and you don’t wear them both out as quickly. I knew there were men who were practical.

      April 4, 2011
  6. Andra, I recognize the excitement!

    When I was young, my parents only allowed me to wear saddle oxfords to school and Mary Janes on Sunday–with white Oxford Keds for play. The saddle oxfords were b/c I had one foot that turned in and I walk on the outside edges of my feet. They felt that sturdy shoes would correct my feet…and they never did.

    I was not allowed to wear flip-flops b/c Mama said they were vulgar. And when we had sandals for the beach, they were slide in types.

    After the 6th grade, I was allowed to wear “big girl shoes” and I remember getting a pair of chunky heeled kiltie loafer type shoes (it was 1969) that I loved.

    Then as now, I set my new shoes out where I can see them, as if on show for the world, the evening before the day I’m to wear them.

    Ironically, I no longer wear heels, but still feel just as excited when looking at my new flat sandals that I found at the giant big-box discount store.

    April 4, 2011
    • I wish I could remember what my shoe preferences were when I was younger.

      No. Strike that. No, I don’t. I sure they were dreadful. I do remember the Aigner period. Eek.

      I hope you wear flip-flops all the time now. :) And, Keds are definitely in style right now.

      April 4, 2011
  7. Linda Watkins (Mom) #

    Shoes? SHOES?? Did somebody mention shoes? Where? Are they on sale? Do they have my size? Do I need a pair? Do I have 10 black pairs already? Do I have room for more shoes? Do I have anything to go with that color? Where will I wear them? Can I hide one more pair from Roy? Did Andra get this fetish from anyone closely related to her?

    April 4, 2011
    • Well, I know I didn’t get it from my father. I think he resembles most of the men who have commented today.

      April 4, 2011
    • Andra, your mom is cracking me up. Too funny. I don’t have a lot of shoes, and I’m finally considering changing my ways. I’m a late shoe bloomer, I guess.

      My husband, on the other hand, is quite the fashionista. His feet are skinny. Otherwise, he would gladly wear MTM’s shoes.

      April 4, 2011
      • MTM went and tried on his dress shoes today because of this post. And, they don’t fit.

        April 4, 2011
  8. Emily Guess #

    I love shoes and so do my daughter and granddaughter. I think it is a girl thing. There is a shoe gene missing on the Y chromosome. Just ignore them because they will never get the shoe thing.

    April 4, 2011
    • It does make MTM happy to buy ME shoes, though. He has bought me new shoes every Christmas for the past three years, I think. Always a pair I would never buy for myself but squealed over at some point or another.

      April 4, 2011
      • Lou Mello #

        Man card alert…man card alert! The closest a man should come to buying a lady’s shoes is to shop with her and grunt approval as required or give a gift card.

        April 4, 2011
      • I disagree Lou. I can think of quite a few pair of shoes I would buy to see certain ladies in them…. ;)

        April 4, 2011
      • I point to what I want online and he clicks “purchase.” It does not endanger his man card to do that. :)

        April 4, 2011
      • And, Carnell, you are just wrong. :)

        April 4, 2011
  9. I’m with MTM. I’m sure I own six or seven pairs, but have not worn more than four of them (counting sandals) for at least ten years.

    Wore the dress shoes back in ’09 for MEvL’s wedding.

    The boat shoes every day (if I wear anything on my feet at all) unless I plan on spending a lot of time on my feet, in which case the totally worn out walking shoes get to see daylight (happens maybe twice per year).

    The Birkenstocks get worn at least once or twice a year.

    As for the others, hunting boots (haven’t been in many years), winter boots (serious winter boots with 1/2 felts great for camping in the Adirondacks in Januarey) kept just in case we have another ice age and it actually gets cold in SC.

    And I almost forgot my favorite leather slippers used mostly as sim-racing footwear.

    Yeah, I’m a real slave to my shoes. :)

    April 4, 2011
    • This whole comment reminds me of MTM’s horrible birkenstock, hush puppy thingies. Horrible, horrible, horrible shoes that he LOVES.

      And, who knows, Bill? You may need those boots one day……..

      April 4, 2011
      • And I bet those horrible birkenstock, hush puppy thingies are as comfortable as can be!

        Women will wear the most horribly uncomfortable shoes because they think they look good, while men, being highly intelligent creatures, will wear the most horrible looking shoes because they feel good.

        April 5, 2011

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