Swamp Fox
I used to know these here waters better’n anybody. Hell, I’d go so far as to say this black water is what runs in my veins. Pumps my heart. Keeps me a-breathing. If you was smart enough to flay me open with the end of my musket, I know that muck is what you’d find in there.
But, you ain’t that smart, and besides, it ain’t wise to match wits with a fox. You gonna lose. Ever time. Besides, it takes a real dumb ass to float around a gator-infested swamp in a soft-sided boat. What was you thinking, Son? Never mind. You wasn’t thinking. I bet you never think past the end of your last idiot idea. Something that revolves around your sorry life. How hard you got it. How much you try. How nobody appreciates you.
All bullshit, Son.
You don’t know hard. That dead gator over there, now he knows hard. Or knew it. I watched him flail around helpless in that water, all fifty years or more of him flashing before his beady yellow eyes. He’s a monster, ain’t he? Big enough to be at least that old. He fought like a good soldier. Yep. I’m sure he wasted his final seconds feeling all sorry for himself, pissed off that an even bigger gator bit him in two. A reptile longer than your flimsy boat. Wider, too. That thing could saw you in half with one chomp, Son, and he wouldn’t even burp.
I spent ages in this here swamp, and I never seen the likes of him. Know it like the inside of my own head. Him and me – we’re the same. Kin. I always knowed how to hide in this here wilderness, and I betcha he did, too. Evasion. It’s a tactic that takes some serious smarts. But, you can’t go on evading life forever, Son. You can float into this black hell, begging to be taken, crying your pathetic little sob stories into the stillness, but life only takes you when it’s through with your ass.
Believe me. I know.
Tide’s turning. You get on outta here. Go on. And, remember what I tole you. Grab ahold of your life and clamp on like that big gator, Son. Quit living the could-a-beens, afore you end up a ghost. And, let me tell you. Having the ghost of the Swamp Fox rattling chains in your hereafter will be hell, Son. I’d always creep up you, but you would never outwit me.
This week’s series of fiction is set in historic Black Mingo Swamp. To start the series at the beginning, click here. To read more about the history of Black Mingo, click here. Thank you for reading, for commenting and for sharing my blog.
The Ghost of Francis Marion continues his helpful ways.
Definitely a character from history that I’d like to meet.
How interesting. I really thought he was going to be a bad guy and not a moralizing wakeup call. Heh. Bet the message got through, though.
To some, he was a bad guy. A very bad guy.
Wise words from a beautiful lady through a Swamp Fox.
Sometimes, I need to hear those words myself, and therefore, I write them.
Ever read any Carl Hiaasen? Something in this monologue reminds me of some of his characters, like ‘Skink’. And just noticed he has a new book titled “Chomp” – complete with gator on the cover. How appropriate!
Good stuff dear, good stuff.
Here you go… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uA12cS0Us_4
I have a couple of his books on my lengthy reading list, though I’m deterring into a NOLa thriller after my current ill-advised selection, a fantastical book that I thought might help me. Instead, it sucks so far.
Gosh, this voice is so strong and compelling. I can still almost hear it even after the piece has ended. The kind of voice that gets in your head and sticks there!
Hugs,
Kathy
I wish I could develop voices like this one for all my characters, Kathy. Right now, I have one character off the blog who practically jumps through the computer screen and puts me in a choke hold, and I have several others who have that potential but aren’t there yet. Early days. Early days.
You have completely captured the vernacular of the South! What wonderful story-telling. What are you currently reading that is so awful? Have you read the latest in pop culture (no, not Fifty Shades) – Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn? Nice psycho-thriller without any gore.
Thanks, Jill. Reading A Million Heavens by John Brandon. Bleh. But, I’m a tough reader these days. I’ll look up Gone Girl. Thanks for the rec.
You surprised me here on two counts, Andra. I just assumed the protagonist was a girl. I went back and read your story from the beginning again, and don’t know why I assumed it, but, did. I like that it was a surprise to me – and I wasn’t sure about this river character; a crusty sort but not a murderer. His voice is strong. Well done!
Maybe he should’ve been female, but he wanted to be a boy.
That’s how we roll down here. I let them be what they want and hope it works out. What’s really hard for me with the real-time writing is that I I know how everything ends now, but it doesn’t really mesh with the beginning, and I can’t go back and edit already published material. Instead, I have to get creative to try to make it all work. 
I really liked that he was a boy, Andra. It was that element of surprise that really grabbed me. We make assumptions as we read and it is the quality of a good writer who adeptly challenges those assumptions. YOU are that good writer. I’m wondering now who the main character is: the boy, the alligator, or the river? What more do you have in store for us?
Point of view is one of the things I’m currently struggling with off the blog, Penny. Who tells the story, and how can I effectively shift the point of view without confusing the reader? Especially with my fiction, I’m always doing exercises here, though I don’t call any real attention to it.
But, alas, I am becoming boringly technical. I detest writing about writing. It gets in the way of the good stuff.
Wow, Andra, another really strong write. I had never come across the Swamp Fox before. But the idea of someone so at home in those places – they’d have to be tough not just to exist but to fend off aggressors.
I’ve always been captivated by Francis Marion’s story. Having grown up around swamps, it is hard for me to imagine someone purposely running through them. I can totally understand how they would be excellent places in which to hide, though.
Wisdom and fear like a squabbling old married couple, aren’t they? Or a kayaker and a swamp fox.
My fears have definitely gotten the best of me today. Ready to turn the page to tomorrow.
We need to get Cameron to come down and go to lunch with us!
I have invited her.
The swamp is a world apart, and I could feel the big bugs buzzing around the murky water and feel the heat inside the shadows. I really enjoy the setting of your story, and the character’s voice in this selection is authentic and believable. This is very special, Andra. D
Like the voice here; he’s enjoyable to listen to.