What to Wear to the Zombie Apocalypse
Lanvin. The first dress that I found in my Dress Quest was a lopsided sweater number with a price tag that transmogrified me into a temporary shopping zombie. It’s so awesome. It’s almost sold out. SURELY I can click ‘add to cart’ without guilt.
But.
There’s this thing. I learned it in the only advertising class I took in college. Dissonance. It’s one of those things that advertisers try to mitigate for big purchases – fast cars, second homes, articles of clothing that cost enough to feed a small country for a year. Because, the larger the price tag multiplied by the more the consumer uses it equals REGRET. Questioning the decision. Wishing a different purchase had been made. Post-purchase dissonance can be really, REALLY bad.
I tried to imagine what I will wear to the Zombie Apocalypse, because an amazing outfit will be required. My finger hovered over the magic mouse, the cursor screaming ‘Add to Cart.’
And, I had all this dissonance. It felt kind of like a gag reflex, only with blood and rotting flesh and decaying beings gnawing on my leg. I saw zombies tearing into that dress………..and I just couldn’t do it. I couldn’t spend umpteen-too-much-money on couture for the Zombie Apocalypse.
So, I did a few shots. Of actual booze. Dissonance lubricated. And, I came back to My Cart. I let my finger press the left side of my magic mouse, allowed it to place the item in my cart.
AND THEY WERE OUT OF MY SIZE!!!!!!!!!!!
$%^&*#$@^%(&*%^$#@@%^&!!!!!!!
Post-purchase dissonance of a different kind.
This post is part of the series Don’t Mess With the Dress. If this is your first visit to the series, please click here to go back to the beginning.
Very cool looking dress. Shame you missed out:)
I’m sure it can still be found online somewhere, Roger. But, I sort of convinced myself that I agree with Jessie’s comment below.
Awwwwww sorry to hear that Andra. I had never thought of planning for what I might wear during the zombie Apocalypse. Here I am storing up lots of weapons and ammo in case it really happens. Now I need to think about what to wear also? Sheesh Oh, on another note. I went to Wallyworld the other day with the idea that I would buy one of the 8 gb Nexus 7 devices. I was secretly hoping they had none in stock which would save me from spending those bucks and saving them for other more important things. When I got there all they had was the 16 GB model which was more than I was willing to spend. Good thing I did not have any booze near by or maybe I would have made the purchase too. LOL
Isn’t it funny how we make these deals with ourselves, James? Only to be foiled when we get there. Can you buy it online?
Yep, I can buy it online but I am using those funds for a new bowling ball instead.
I think it was actually God talking through the megaphone, saying “Andra, that one looks really uncomfortable, and that twisty bit that looks so sexy in the picture would tug right around the middle so you would be forever squirming”.
I have to agree. The more I looked at it, the more uncomfortable its possibility became.
I agree with you, Jessie. Not that I’ve ever worn a dress. hehehe
And there’s nothing worse than uncomfortable clothes that you spent a lot of money on, right?
I’ve never really spent a lot of money on a piece of clothing, so this whole quest is entirely new territory for me.
Okay, I take that back. I did buy a ridiculous coat in Copenhagen one time, and I still squeal every time I look at it, think about it or wear it.
always dangerous to lube up before getting on the computer…
wait, what?
HAhahahahahahaha!!!
Every time I have hovered and hesitated over that button, it has proved to be the right thing to do, Andra. On to the next dress ????
I know I did the right thing with this one, Penny.
Gorgeous dress….and I knew not a thing about dissonance. I must remember that next time I click ‘add to cart…’
It is a hard thing to remember until the deed is done.
I hate it when that happens, Andra. Only with me it’s in a shop and not online. And not with dresses either.
Surely one of your alter egos wears a dress, Tom?
Maybe Thomasina, Andra, but I’m not really sure. I think she likes to dress as Wonder Woman. My Inner Zombie may wear a dress too… but whatever it was, it now just looks like rags! He’ll fit in with the Zombie Apocalypse!
Haha. Wonder Woman is a good look, though.
Maybe Thomasina, Andra, but I’m not really sure. I think she likes to dress as Wonder Woman. My Inner Zombie may wear a dress too… but whatever it was, it now just looks like rags! He’ll fit in with the Zombie Apocalypse!
Ohhhh!!! That was fabulous!!! I get it and the dress is to die for!!!!
Too bad I wasn’t able to pull the trigger, Valerie.
Oh, Andra, this sounds like a great series! Love this post. I’ve missed getting to read yours in the past couple of weeks. However, I should be back to a regular blogging schedule Monday morning. About time, right?
Hugs,
Kathy
I’m looking forward to catching up with you, too, Kathy.
All it needs is a little scarlet.
Ha. Why does everyone think I will end up with a red dress?
I actually like that dress. Looks both sexy and comfortable. And soft. Looks like it would be nice to rub up against. Subtly. Slowly. Oh so casually.
I like the dress, but not sexy enough for you in your new condition. No red, btw.
I shouldn’t buy red is what you’re saying, Ted?
Yes… you are the red in the bouquet of Andra…
If you are determined to spend a lot of money, surely it makes sense to try it on first? Like buying a car without test driving it, something I never thought my sensible father would do, but he did, despite my warning him that the type of gearbox it had was horrible. And he hates the car. Can you return a dress bought over the internet?
Yes, returns over the internet are easy, unless one buys from a final sale with a limited return policy or something like that.
What do I know? I thought it looked comfy except that if it were me I’d be sucking in my gut all evening…but then again, no matter what I wear I suck it in…
I still suck mine in, too, Lori. You’re not alone.
When I look around at the collected accumulation of stuff filling our living space and closets . . . I am FILLED to overflowing with dissonance and buyer’s remorse.
If I could tell my younger self JUST ONE THING, it would be “BUY LESS. Do More.”
These days, my mantra is ‘Buy less. Travel more.”
I love the dress, Andra, but for a zombie soiree it’s perhaps a little too chic! I see something a bit more trashy in my mind’s eye. Perhaps that’s not the look you’re longing for, but it should be a lot easier to find a selection in any size!
Debra
It does amaze me how many trashy dresses I can pin to my pin board.
Looks comfy to me, but I do better in structured dresses — way too straight! So pretty, though.
I love the lines of it. Still do.