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Open Mouth. Insert _______.

Once upon a time, I had a thriving management consulting firm. Before the crash. Before tons of people lost their jobs and decided to hang up the “I-Can-Do-Anything-She-Can-Do” shingle. Before I went for my dream, to make something that’s mine and write.

I still take clients, here and there, but back when I was billing exponential consulting hours per week, I produced an e-newsletter. The writing was sort of dry, but that was never really the point for me.

The pictures. They were what kept me producing the e-newsletter. How could I take a specific picture and build a whole management consulting newsletter – one that would actually be useful – around a single ridiculous photo?

In the coming days, I’m going to dig out some of these open-mouthed jewels, dust them off, and craft a story on the blog. Here’s the first installment:

She had a hard time. Climbing down the slick mound had worn her out, but she clung to it. Fiercely. And now, the ground was mostly level.

Mostly.

She thrashed through what remained to reach bottom. Things that tickled her face and stuck in her hair. A relentless downhill after the climax.

She’d done it all before.

Still, she didn’t expect it. In the waning hours of daylight, she found a package along her path. A gift. A thank-you for coming.

Too bad it wasn’t all tied up with a grizzly bear bow.

43 Comments Post a comment
  1. I love these open mouth pictures. You know that though. And you know that I have a full collection of them. Of you with your mouth open. Some with statues. Some with paintings. Some with food. Most without. But all of them fantastic. And all of them reminding me of how much I love to hear you talk. In speech, in writing, in pictures. But always your spark shing through.

    November 13, 2012
    • I hope I can find all of them to do this series. I know I have tons. This was how I thought one smiled when I was really little, so it’s great to see that some things never change. :)

      November 13, 2012
  2. That is a hilarious picture. And I can’t wait to see where you take us in the story.

    November 13, 2012
  3. Wow, my old business newsletters never looked anything like that. No wonder I had to move on. Love it Andra! :-)

    November 13, 2012
    • When I started getting more corporate-type work, I had to let that style go.

      November 13, 2012
      • Hate how they put the boring into corporate – however they do it. I still hate it.

        November 14, 2012
      • It’s universal, isn’t it?

        November 14, 2012
      • Dire Straits nailed it with “Industrial Disease.” Mind numbing nothingness that leads to the doctor’s office.

        November 14, 2012
  4. Excellent.

    November 13, 2012
  5. Sometimes you get the bear and sometimes the bear gets you….

    http://video.nationalgeographic.com/video/animals/crittercam-animals/bear_brown_crittercam/

    November 13, 2012
    • I cannot even click on that link, Lou. I am deathly afraid of bears.

      November 13, 2012
      • It’s just a little cub…. :)

        November 13, 2012
  6. Hahaha. That photo pretty much sums up why I like you, Andra. My go-to expression is one of Shock & Awe Hell Naw. Yours is a refreshing Shock & Awwwww.

    November 13, 2012
  7. I don’t know how you can make your mouth do that, it’s so expressive! I hope you’re feeling better today.

    November 13, 2012
    • I had pep in my step at Rotary, but I don’t know how long it will last before I’m asleep again……… Thanks for the well wishes.

      November 13, 2012
  8. Creative, very creative. Nothing like finding fresh bear poop along the trail…unless you catch the bear in the act….

    November 13, 2012
    • I’ve also found prints before. (I’m sure you have, too.) We were in the middle of a big valley when I saw the print, and I swear, I wanted to run all the way back to the car………..it was a long way.

      November 13, 2012
  9. The pics tell us why you were/are such a fine consultant: You aren’t afraid to say, do, discuss what is (to some) off the chart. You (split infinitive warning) boldly go… :-)

    November 13, 2012
    • I’ll probably have to boldly go again in the coming months, but for now, it’s been fun to have my writing diversion. I’ve got a project to complete while my book is out with my readers, and we’ll see what happens from there.

      November 13, 2012
  10. Speaking of wide open mouths…love this Betty Hutton clip and the line I have invoked a time or two in my life!

    Mostly, the beginning of this series makes me think of numerous instances of sliding down some slope, unexpectedly; then picking up the pieces and starting over. So glad that when the bottom dropped away you decided to set a new course, follow that dream and write!

    November 13, 2012
  11. Loved this!

    November 13, 2012
  12. Fabulous punchline today :-D

    November 13, 2012
  13. You really can’t trust a grizzly. Us black bears, now…

    November 13, 2012
    • MTM and I both got a big laugh out of this comment. :)

      November 13, 2012
  14. What a great idea, Andra. You always come up with best ones. I have to admit–got a kick out the the bear comment above mine! How funny!
    Hugs,
    kathy

    November 13, 2012
    • We’ll see how it progresses, Kathy. The comments here are always worth reading.

      November 13, 2012
  15. We just watched Brave . . . based on the legend of Mordu . . . with lots of B~I~G Bears. Scat! Scat! ;)

    November 13, 2012
    • I still need to see that one, Nancy. I love those cartoon movies.

      November 14, 2012
  16. I love the photo, Andra! You are so expressive–that’s another part of your gift! I love the little story and think this could be a very enjoyable series. It was interesting to hear a little more about your consulting business. I think the recession did a real number on every consultant I know. I was talking to another friend the other day who told me she is beginning to get her clients back…depending on whether you’re personally ready or not, this could be good news. OR…maybe the time to write is precisely what you need most! :-)

    November 13, 2012
    • I have always had work, just not always interesting or enough to keep me busy. That restless energy went into my writing, which has not ended up being a bad thing. Well, except during those times when I have been super busy with work and still blogged every day. I hope those times weren’t obvious. :)

      November 14, 2012
  17. I love the idea of you producing a newsletter based around that! Too funny.

    November 15, 2012
    • The official caption on the newsletter was “Don’t step in it. Call POSITUS!”

      I should’ve been in advertising.

      November 15, 2012
  18. One of the things I like about Andra.

    November 16, 2012

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