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Motherlover

duct tape

To be continued the next day. On Mother’s Day.

My mother is steadfast. She pulled my father off the toilet in Collinwood, Tennessee, while I cowered behind the bed. “My feet hurt too much for this,” was my excuse. Almost four hundred miles of walking. Day after day.

I thought I earned the right to avoid the sight of my father’s manhood.

Mom never flinched, though. She hung with me for three weeks. Through swamps. And oozing blisters. And lots of crying.

Not to mention the crap Dad did. (Really. He spread his essence across three states.)

I started my 444-mile walk of the Natchez Trace thinking it would help me understand my Dad, but I ended it a Mother Lover. Because Mom didn’t cringe at whatever my trek dredged up.

Bloody feet.

Muscle cramps.

Vomiting and dizziness.

Not to mention how grouchy the rest of it made me.

For a decade, I wished Mom would accept who I’d become. And somewhere in Mississippi, she did. Or maybe she did before, and I refused to see it. Pain is a great magnifying glass; stupidity a microscope.

On this Mother’s Day, I hope my own mother knows how much she means to me, how grateful I am for everything she’s always been. Even when I was too stupid to see it.

Happy Mother’s Day, Mom.

***********

MTM surprised me and crashed my Montreat writing getaway. A Tumblr of what that means for my writing: Andra Watkins Tumblr

Get the book even my mother loves. You know you need a gift for Father’s Day. To Live Forever: An Afterlife Journey of Meriwether Lewis is available in paperback and e-book formats at these outlets: Click to Purchase To Live Forever.

amazon.kindle.barnesnook.ibookstore.kobo

 

48 Comments Post a comment
  1. Happy Mother’s Day! For some oddball reason, I woke up and turned on the TV and this was on, so it kind of fits. Sort of.

    https://archive.org/details/delicious_dishes

    But it’s better than what I missed for a Mother’s Day film:

    Then again, for me, it’s always a coin toss as to how weird my own Mother’s Day will turn out… :D

    May 11, 2014
    • And I’m such a bad daughter that I spent the day away from my mother.

      May 11, 2014
  2. i love this, and happy mother’s day to your mother who finally knows you and accepts who you are. a wonderful gift.

    May 11, 2014
  3. Why did mom have to pull Roy off the toilet and why were you cringing behind the bed? Sounds a bit wild….

    May 11, 2014
  4. “. . . hope my own mother knows how much she means to me, how grateful I am for everything she’s always been.” She knows, Andra. Trust me, she knows. Hope she has a wonderful Mother’s Day.

    May 11, 2014
  5. I’m sure she had accepted you all the time, but it was good to be able to recognize it! What great memories you will have from your adventures!

    May 11, 2014
    • Going back through them now and enjoying the roller coaster ride.

      May 11, 2014
  6. Jill Clary Stevenson #

    What she did for you on your walk, she also did for you when you were little. Mothering never stops, it just changes course!

    May 11, 2014
    • That’s what everyone tells me. Hope you had a lovely Mother’s Day.

      May 11, 2014
  7. Ditto to what Karen said above – your mom knows. I can’t wait to see what you write about Father’s Day.
    Beautiful day up here with sunshine and everything is green, green, green!

    May 11, 2014
    • I’m drowning in pollen. Green green green, too. :) Hope you had a great Mother’s Day, Penny.

      May 11, 2014
  8. I believe mothers are always accepting, but they get to the point where they stop trying to mold you as they want you and simply let you be the wonderful person that you are.

    May 11, 2014
  9. Yay for your surprise visit!

    May 11, 2014
    • He’s gone now, and it’s too quiet here.

      May 11, 2014
      • Enjoy the quiet! When I get to my hotel in NYC tomorrow I plan to celebrate Mothers Day all over again, all by myself. :-)

        May 11, 2014
  10. Having that time with your mum was a true gift.

    May 11, 2014
  11. Write on!

    May 11, 2014
    • I’m astonished at the number of words I can make when I get rid of distractions.

      May 11, 2014
  12. We are all blinded by our stupidity and some finally see the light when it is too late. Wonderful that you are there!! Xo

    May 11, 2014
  13. Er, this toilet thing … is she trying to get him to continue going behind trees?

    May 11, 2014
    • No. I hope he’s done with that, even though he goes in their back yard all the time.

      May 11, 2014
  14. What a gift. Happy Mother’s Day.

    May 11, 2014
  15. Fabulous lady, fabulous post. Happy Mother’s Day, Andra’s Mom xxx

    May 11, 2014
  16. The real secret of motherhood is this: generally our mothers love us in spite of ourselves. Love you and the nurturing you do for so many.

    May 11, 2014
  17. Aw. Nice

    May 11, 2014
  18. These last few posts have been a great tribute to your mom and your love for her.
    I don’t know if my mom (age 90+) will ever really see me as more than her child (hello, mom, I am in my late 50s!!!). She still seems awestruck when I do things like … drive us through interstate traffic for two hours so she can visit her sister. Like she still can’t believe I’m old enough and responsible to do it and do it safely :) But that’s okay because, frankly, she’s still here and that’s all that matters to me.

    May 11, 2014
    • That’s all that should matter, I think. It’s great that she’s still up for adventures. I hope I’ll be like that.

      May 11, 2014
  19. I think your Mum’s been doing things for your Dad that are way beyond the call of duty…is there an equivalent of the Medal of Honour for ass wiping:)

    May 12, 2014
  20. Maybe your mother just wanted you to figure it our on your own. I’m sure she accepted you long ago and I know she is very proud of you. Maybe you should have left your dad at home and just hiked with your mom. I’m still not convinced that MTM didn’t follow behind in a motorhome.

    May 12, 2014
    • p.s. Dear Lord… who duct taped your feet?

      May 12, 2014
    • I duct taped my feet on the walk. It was supposed to keep me from getting blisters, but it didn’t work.

      We looked into getting a motorhome, but the bed and breakfast route was more economical. I wish MTM could’ve been along the whole time, but somebody has to pay for my stupidity.

      May 12, 2014
  21. Andra, I hope you and your mom had a wonderful Mother’s Day. Glad you guys bonded over your walk. Um, I had the same question tedstrutz had.

    May 12, 2014
  22. Is it weird I could read thousands of words of this?

    Happy Mom day to your mom.

    May 12, 2014
  23. tarakianwarrior #

    After spending the last few days with my Mother…we also are in a much better place. I need to get out of my head.

    May 13, 2014
  24. Andra,

    I loved this story. I think we all have to get to a certain age before we realize how smart our mom’s are. As a teenager, I remember thinking how stupid my mom was. In my twenties, I thought she was learning and before she died, she was a genius to me. Funny how she got smarter as I aged.

    May 13, 2014

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