During our last episode of F’ed Up Fantasy Family, I reported the gift of an iPad to my aging parents. They wanted access to FaceTime in a purported bid to follow new-ish extended family members.
I was convinced they would use FaceTime while naked.
I pondered the brain-bleaching consequences of Naked FaceTime With Aging Parents. For hours. And days. Experts claim one can banish worry by imagining the worst possible thing that can happen.
THAT ISN’T EFFING TRUE.
I haven’t slept since I gave my parents an iPad. Thanks to you, Dear Reader, I’ve imagined every conceivable scenario of shriveled, wrinkled, toilet-ridden, butt-dialing parental FaceTime nakedness. I had to do something to relieve the pressure, to rid myself of shrieking every time my iPhone/iPad/MacBookAir brayed another FaceTime request.
I decided to be the first Naked FaceTimer.
I would beat them at their own game.
If I called my parents from the bathtub, surely they would see how ridiculous I looked, and they wouldn’t try to copy me.
Here I am, FaceTiming my mother from the sanctuary of my guest bathroom.
(I’m the naked one in the upper right-hand corner, not the naked one taking up most of the screen.)
I guess she showed me.
Read What Happened When I Gave My Parents an iPad HERE.