Dad Is Well Hung In Seattle

Remember the movie Sleepless in Seattle? Well, Ted Strutz gave it a whole new Dad Is Well Hung meaning with his latest contest entry. If Roy were on this tour, do you think he’d enjoy it?

Golly Molly, Andra! Don’t tell me we’re going on a boat. You trying to kill me? Did I tell you about that time I was in the army? When I had to go on that ship to Southampton, England? The puke was flowing down them hallways. Never wanted to see no ship again after that.

Good thing you got me perched over the side here, because HLEEAAHHHurkurkBLLEAAHH!!!!!!! (Wipes mouth on sleeve.) Hey there. Yeah, you. My daughter wrote this here book. Wanna buy it?

What kinda tour is this? First you half kill me on a boat, and now you done gone and took me shopping? Did Linda put you up to forcing me to buy her some extra Christmas finery she don’t need? Because if you dangle me over the side of this balcony much longer, I’m liable to buy that woman anything.

This is the worst tour I’ve ever taken in my entire life. What exactly do you call that there thing, huh? ART? Looks like a pile of junk to me.

You trying to kill me? I-Talian food? I don’t eat no I-Talian. That stuff gives me the runs, and (chompchompchomp) I don’t like that green stuff, and (gobblegobblegobble) tomatoes give me gas, and…………You gonna eat that? ‘Cause it’d be a shame to waste it.

So, you fill me full of I-Talian food, and you drag me to some god-awful shindig, like one of them plays Andra was always doing. Couldn’t stand none of them things……except for that one old guy. Always made me laugh. Wonder if he’s in this ‘un. ‘Cause if this ain’t funny, I could get up there. Did I ever tell you about that time my daddy made me dance on the bar? Yeah, I was two or three, and him and his friends paid me pennies and nickels to smoke cigars and cuss. My Hot Shot routine’d be a hit in a place like See-attle. Lemme see if I can find my way to the front……..

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Geez, Ted. Dad will never be the same!

Hurry! Time is running out! Get your final entries for my #DadIsWellHung Contest ready. All entries must be posted by 11:59pm EST TOMORROW, December 24, 2015.

1. Post a photo of said gift on social media.
2. Hashtag it #dadiswellhung.

That’s it! Every #dadiswellhung update will be entered to win the #DadIsWellHung Contest.

First Prize: A $25 gift card to Amazon/iTunes/Barnes and Noble (winner’s choice)

Second Prize: A $15 gift card to Amazon/iTunes/Barnes and Noble (winner’s choice)

Third Prize: A $10 gift card to Amazon/iTunes/Barnes and Noble (winner’s choice)

And to encourage creativity…..
A $25 gift card of choice will be awarded to
MOST CREATIVE #DadIsWellHung post!!!

The only rules for Most Creative?

1. Post a photo of said gift on social media.
2. Hashtag it #dadiswellhung.

So EVERYBODY can wow Dad with creative homages to his well-hung-ness. Come back tomorrow for a selection of our favorite #DadIsWellHung entries so far.

Winners will be chosen at random on December 26, 2015, except for Most Creative. YOU will vote for your favorite.