Has 2020 broken you, dear soul?
You’re not alone.
I entered 2020 with more paid speaking gigs than ever. After years of trying, I was poised to break into a full-fledged speaking schedule with fees and reimbursed expenses and professional cred.
My books were still selling despite the many algorithmic changes designed to hide them unless I paid for reach.
Setbacks help us see what’s broken.
I’m heading into 2021 with so much self love, massive self respect, and REST. I have a new novel. I’m working on a couple of new projects.
We can heal from this year, dear soul. We can go on. I’m cheering for you. Every rung step shot breath.
I was supposed to watch the sunset.
August 2020. Skagastrond sea cliffs. I sprinted from the NES studio and climbed this stand of ancient basalt in time to watch the sun dip into the Arctic Ocean. At this northern latitude, it was still light near midnight.
While I try not to dwell in the past these days, I’m glad I took a deep breath and looked back. The sun merged with cloud and threw a party over my shoulder.
And reminded me how far I’ve come.
I’m excited to return to NES as writer-in-residence February and March 2021.
Throwback to that time I wore my first wedding dress in a play.
What a meringue!
Recent Reads: I Know You Know by Gilly MacMillan (@gillymacamillan on Instagram)
A damning indictment of our internet obsessed culture, this thriller does not disappoint. A child dead. Twenty years later, one of his friends is putting together a whodunnit documentary in a world where no character is who or what they seem.
This one will keep you turning pages all night. Get it HERE.
➡️ I purchase every new book featured with my own funds. I do not offer endorsements in exchange for a feature. My opinions are honest assessments of books I read, enjoy, and believe worthy of your time. Creators cannot create if people fail to support their work with actual money. I am doing my part to support worthy writers in many genres and career stages.
Can you do a split? I can’t either. Obviously.
But this is a picture of me stretching trying reaching growing. Pride in discomfort. Peace in the journey. Acceptance of where I am. Belief in where I’m headed.
Yoga teaches me to appreciate where I am while honoring where I’ve been and preparing for my future. Split pose is such a visceral, gorgeous picture of that juxtaposition on the physical vessel. It reminds me I’m alive.
One of the hardest things about continued recovery from my evangelical upbringing? Accepting who I am.
Evangelical thinking is cult-like in the sense that it teaches rigid agreement with the church. I cannot count the times I was told I had a “bad attitude” growing up, simply because I disagreed with the man in charge. I have always been curious and adventurous, but I was broken in a world where those qualities led to sin perversion debauchery a falling away.
I’m grateful to accept who I am, the person I’ve really always been.
But here’s something to understand when speaking to those from this background: They learn NOT to be curious or consider any viewpoint not endorsed by their leader. I hope my upcoming book The Evangelicals: A Novel captures this dynamic with nuance and realism.
Writers sometimes write to learn from the destructive characters in our lives.
It’s especially true with my upcoming book The Evangelicals: A Novel.
While it’s fiction, I plumbed deep into my evangelical upbringing to build flawed, realistic characters you’ll love. And love to hate.
A turning point for this story? When Pete Buttigieg publicly owned his faith.
He said something that resonated with me. The right-wing interpretation of faith is broken. It isn’t the only one available. He said they have “lost all claim to ever use religious language again.” I cheered because I am weary of certain people defining faith for all of us. I crafted this story to address my own frustration, to show the difference between the two.
In the process, I proved to myself I learned A LOT from the destructive characters in my life.
6 Comments
I’m looking forward to reading your take on Evangelicals. It’s a brand of crazy I was also exposed to, and escaped, thank goodness.
We are both survivors, my dear.
The novel passes all the tests. It should graduate with honors. 🙂
I appreciate your thoughtful notes. Some more work to do, but it will get there thanks to early readers like you.
So many bits that inspire me here.
Good to hear. Trying to keep my social together here, in case you don’t see them because of algorithms.
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