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Andra Watkins

A Birthday Shag

I admit it. As humiliating as it is to confess, especially to a big ole audience like this one, I’ll just put it out there. Today, I’m forty-three years old. Middle-aged. A little saggier and baggier today than I was yesterday. So, I ought to be able to own just about anything without fear, right?

This one is tougher, though. I’m supposed to know how to do it by now. I’ve had gaggles of boyfriends in my life. Heck, I said ‘I Do’ to two men, NOT at the same time.

Umtpeen opportunities to perfect my technique. Countless attempts to go all the way. At times, practically begging these boys to make me a real woman instead of a groping, clueless girl.

I don’t know how to shag.

It’s the state dance of South Carolina, a whirling, twirling, foot-shuffling vision on the pulsing dance floor. It requires two people, and one of them really needs to know how to lead. Which takes me to my next problem.

I don’t follow well.

So, for most of my life, I have implored various unlucky men to take me and make me a shagger, only to step on their toes, heat-butt them, try to twirl them instead of the other way around, and generally scare them to freaking death. MTM won’t even shag with me.

Is a forty-three year old woman too old to learn to shag? Because, I’d really love to swirl around the dancing space to Stagger Lee, my very favorite shagging song of all time.

Do you have a favorite shag song, Dear Reader? The dance or THE DANCE, doesn’t matter to me which one you mean.

Wink.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FCPutYaGFlE]

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130 Comments

  1. Good morning Andra and Happy Birthday. I can’t shag either but go on up to Myrtle Beach and take some lessons if you’re so inclined.

  3. You had to go and do it, didn’t you?
    I’ve had tears streaming down my cheeks reading this post, and I’ve only just realigned my breathing. And the heat butt didn’t help. It’s revenge, isn’t it, for my censorship post?
    ***
    Happy Birthday, Andra, by the way! 😀
    43 isn’t middle-aged you know. It wasn’t in my case anyway! Nowhere near! 😉

      1. Yup, we do, Andra. As a result, I was reading, anticipating the juicy bits, and even wondering what you were talking about …

    2. For me too, Eugene. Imagine my surprise on discovering a building on Center St. with the sign out front: The Island Shag Club…

  5. Happy Birthday. I don’t remember why, but turning forty was the birthday that was the most difficult for me. After forty–no problem. Love Stagger Lee too. Take care.

    1. Thanks for the birthday wishes. I always welcome my birthday. It beats the alternative……

      1. The alternative? Birthnight?

        Happy VERY belated birthday! Like more than a year!

        So happy belated birthday for the NEXT one too! And birthnight.

        Best,

        — xPraetorius

  6. Happy Birthday lady! Wishing you all the best for a super day and beyond. XO

  7. Happy Happy Birthday!

  8. Happy Birthday! I’ve decided that we are going to make 43 an awesome year (as I hit that number earlier this month). I knew we had a lot in common. This post made me smile. I spent one summer while I was in college in North Myrtle Beach. While there, an older woman took me under her wing and took me out to learn how to shag. I wasn’t very good, but she She is one of those women who I lost track of as soon as the summer was over, but she really had an impact on my life. I think I might have to write about her.

    Have a wonderful day. Go out and shag. Who cares if you are good? Have fun!

    <3 Lisa

    1. Isn’t it great to get inspiration? I hope to read about her soon, Lisa.

      Wow that you spent time in North Myrtle Beach. I was just there a couple of weekends ago. It has changed so much since I started going there at 5.

  10. Andra, HAPPY BIRTHDAY from all of us here: from Al, and Felix and Maddie and Phil and I. We are so pleased to have come across your writing this year: meeting you was fab. Thank you for your exuberant take on life, for the toilet lizard, for taking the trouble to come and visit a small-time scribbler every day. May the next year be your most exciting and fulfilling yet: and may your family be healthy and happy throughout.

    (A naughty aside: you know England well, and you will know the alternative meaning of shag here. Your title, combined with that most engaging of pictures, entertained us mightily. No: one is never too old to learn to shag, and it can be immensely, overwhelmingly rewarding.)

    1. Thank you Kate. You are not small time, and you are very gifted. My readers sure do love you, and they are a distinguished bunch.

      See my reply to Tom above about the shagging. 🙂 We are bad, bad people over here. 🙂

  13. Watch the seinfeld episode with the Elaine dance and u will know that i understand completely…..Elaine is meeeeeeee haha.

    1. I know the one you mean, Emily. Lord help everybody if you and I ever grace the dance floor together.

  14. That picture of you is almost as funny as your gargoyle impression. And I loved the coy lead-in. I confess. Scott doesn’t dance at all. He’s like Kermit.
    http://youtu.be/yr7v05KvggM

    And he doesn’t like music when we capital D Dance.

    1. MTM has to be plied with a little adult beverage, but it can be done. We once danced so much at a wedding that someone told us to get a room, and I tore my dress.

      1. By the way! I forgot the ‘happy birthday’ part!! I meant to. But the brain is smallll.

  16. We make our own music when we Shag!

  17. I can’t shag either . . . Gene and I used to dance every chance we could get (we met at a dance), but we were aficionados of a different era (and he never lived in “the South” :)). Watching a couple of the videos here though, I’m sorry we never had the opportunity to try; it looks remarkably similar to some of our old “routines.” I’m with the group that says to go take lessons someplace. You’re never too old to learn a new dance step, and dancin’ will help ward off those “baggy, saggy thingys.” Happy Birthday! 🙂

    PS. Did you know that this is also National Chocolate Covered Raisin Day?

    1. I did NOT know that, Karen, but I did have raisins this morning. 🙂

      I wish I could’ve seen you and Gene together.

      1. And I was lamenting as I wrote here this morning; all those fun hours we spent on various dance floors, and I don’t know of a single photo that exists as evidence of it. Don’t ever stop taking all those wonderful photos that you do……they’ll help someday when memories get fuzzy ’round the edges.

  18. Happy Birthday dear Andra. I hope you have a beautiful day. I do not know how to shag either. I spent a lot of time dancing to disco music but those days are long gone.

    3. Another one I love!

  20. Happy birthday!

    I say find a ruthless leader of a dance instructor and Shag all you like. I’ve got a serious case of The Two Left Feet, so I’ll be envious of you when you learn.

    1. I am terrified of trying again. My every attempt has been a disaster. Thanks for the birthday wishes.

  21. Happy Birthday 😀

    43- I remember that. It’s not middle aged. I have 47 coming up, and I’m pretty sure that’s not middle aged either

    Deluded in Ireland

  22. Wow, so educational, Andra.

    I have not heard of the dance shag. I might have heard of the verb “to shag.” But that’s a whole different thing.

    Splendid post. Hope your birthday is fabulous, and that you and MTM have a wonderful April 1st event!

    1. It is a South Carolina thing, associated with beach music. The Embers. The Drifters. Etc. Might be funny to introduce to your friends in California.

  23. Happy Birthday dear lady! Knowing you has enriched my life, and made me a better person!

    I learned to shag in the “front room” of my aunt’s house in Summerville SC. My cousin’s tied a sock to the door handle and made me practice the steps while holding onto the sock. I love to shag! And my favorite shag songs are the oldies.

    Come to think of it all my fave shaggin songs are all about doin’ IT! Especially 60 minute man!

    The Showmen’s 39-21-40 Shape http://youtu.be/Y2o3206Ko2I
    Billy Ward and the Dominos Sixty Minute Man http://youtu.be/jh6re_I__HQ
    Double Shot of My Baby’s Love by the Swinging Medallions http://youtu.be/qDEmmLDyHZc

      2. I could never sit out Miss Grace. I would dance by myself or with another girl just to have the chance to move to it’s wonderful swinging rhythm.

  24. I love to shag…Henry and I took lessons several years ago. In my dancing mind, I’m much smoother and shag-savvy than I actually am. My favorite song is 60 Minute Man.

    1. I wish you’d share your dancing mind with me, Kristi. Then, I might not care how stupid I look trying to shag. 🙂

    1. Well, Nancy. As a USC law grad, at least you know what shagging is, and I didn’t shock you to death today. Both great shagging artists, too. 🙂 Thanks for the birthday wishes.

    2. I am now in love with nrhatch… Best Band in the Land. Boz is pretty damn good too…

  26. Shagging has completely different connotations in our part of town – still good though, but very different 😉 Happy birthday Andra – may it be a very auspicious year!

    1. Linda, I have always found the multiple definitions of the word ‘shag’ very amusing. 🙂 Thanks for the messages on Twitter today and for the wishes here. I’m so glad I ‘met’ you during my last year, and look forward to getting to know you better in the coming one.

  27. Hooray, the comments are working ;D I read your blog to my folks tonight after supper – we laughed, a lot! Brilliant piece

    1. I am so glad it is having the desired impact around the globe. 🙂 🙂 🙂

  28. Great post! I wish you a very happy birthday! And by the way, you look like you’re in your thirties. 🙂

      1. I was commenting on the strength of having seen a number of your pics on here as well as this one. 🙂 I hope you had a great day!

  29. I am a good Southern boy, so yes I do. Of course. And the favorite song? Has to be “Save the Last Dance for Me” by the Drifters. The greatest beach music producers of all time.

    Nancy’s parents were actually championship shaggers in their day. They used to enter competitions up at the Pavilion in Myrtle Beach.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-XQ26KePUQ

    1. I wish the Pavilion were still there. The last time I was in Myrtle Beach, we drove past the blank swath of land where it used to be, and I almost cried.

  30. Dear Andra… I would love to Shag with you! But since you are my daughter’s age and you don’t know me yet, we’d better stick with the Dancing.

    Now, anyone who likes STAGGER LEE is okay in my book. That is not only one of my favorites, but quite old and has a lot of history. I was shagging to Lloyd Price in Junior High, although we didn’t know to call it that. It would be some time before the other ‘shagging’ occurred. My all time shagging song, for dancing and from that period also, is AT THE HOP by Danny and the Juniors… turn it on and dance around your room…. see what you think.

    http://youtu.be/GwCGW58DTE4

    I’m sure you can do it!

    I have to admit, your photo at the top sucked me in.. Ancient Monument indeed… I’m keen to explore your blog, as your titles are inviting…

    2. Ted, thanks for contributing these great songs for shag-dancing. 🙂 I hope you enjoy reading around the blog.

  31. Happy birthday Andra! Another bucket list item, I think.

  32. Happy, happy birthday, Andra. You have many wonderful years ahead of you, so enjoy each one! It is a delight to celebrate with you, even from such a distance. I must admit that I have never even heard of the Shag…which disappoints me. I don’t really like to admit I don’t know OFsomething! I took Arthur Murray ballroom dancing lessons for about a year not all that long ago…just because I wanted to learn. Find a way to learn the Shag and enjoy! You have many dancing years ahead of you. Birthday blessings, Debra

    1. I wonder if they teach shagging around the country. Lots of places in South Carolina to get lessons. I wonder if the Arthur Murray folks would know the shag. Here’s a link to a dancing scene from the movie Shag. I put a link in the post, but I’m not sure how many people followed it to see what shagging looks like.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TV9WACDEBV4

      1. I don’t know Andra, but that dance could lead to all sorts of ruin for a good southern girl! But it sure does look like fun 😉 I am sure you could find lessons somewhere…but MTM might be concerned about the character and intentions of the teacher! Think carefully before committing! D

  34. boo! Happy Belated birthday, Andra! Don’t know what to say about the shagging business, sounds like a personal problem…ha! (this is coming from someone who is unable to ever SLOW dance with a partner)

  35. Happy Birthday! My favorite shag song in college was “Buttercup” That song always brings a smile to my face.
    yaakov….

  36. I do not have a favourite shag song.
    I just love the fact you use the word ‘shag’!

    x

    2. I was a bit shocked to see Andra use that word myself, bobbyf. But knowing her, and her tremendous fashion sense… I could see a ‘shag’ on a ‘shag’. Oh Wait… she was talking about dancing… would be hard to do on a carpet I would think.

  37. I’d not heard of this dance. Interesting post. I once said in London that my friend was “bent” (local slang for crazy in my neighborhood). The room fell silent. It meant something different in London.

      1. Gay. In the working class pub I was in, that idea didn’t go over well.

  38. Thank you for dropping by and liking my post! I think your blog is cute! Chin up! 🙂

  39. Hey. Hope you had a good day. This post actually made me laugh because here in London, shag means to have sex. Lol. x

    1. I once offered to take an English friend for shag lessons. You can imagine the look on his face…..

      1. If you’d offered me that I might have choked on my coffee too. I love the internet, you learn a new thing everyday.

  40. Thanks for the like and the follow 🙂
    You have good content, looking forward to some further reading 🙂
    Danni

  42. Brave, honest, funny writing! Really enjoyed it 🙂 follow me too if you like it!

  43. I’ll turn 40 in December. I thought I knew how to shag.

    I must rethink everything now.

  47. A rather misleading title, for us who are not versed in American cultural lingo. A shag, as I understand it(people with British origins) is a good romp in the sack: sex. You still had me going at the beginning, wishing for a real man to make a woman out of you. Quite amusing. I’ve learnt something new today. Thanks for stopping by as well. Cheers.

  48. Hilarious! Never ever heard of the dance so this was QUITE a read, til I realised! Brilliant!

  49. I can soooo relate to this. I’ve never been a good dancer (and let’s clarify that we are talking about something on the dance floor with clothes on). It doesn’t matter whether it’s Disco, the Texas four-step (which should explain how bad a dancer I really am), or the Robot, which makes me look like a mime with special needs. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. Neither is turning 43. And not just becaause I’ll be 47 in August… That said, Happy Birthday. I hope you had a good shagging. (And we are no longer talking about the dance floor). Cheers!

      1. Even when it isn’t, I could think of worse things 🙂

  53. Happy Birthday. Love your blog. I live in SC but I’m a NY/NJ girl. When I first visited here four years ago. After an almost 12-hour drive, my friends wanted to take me to the local watering hole on the lake (a place I love now). As I sat at the bar resting my brain and sipping a vodka, this older guy at the bar strikes up a conversation (people are friendly here and I love it) – after five minutes he looked at me and say “Hey, you wanna shag?” Up until then my only experience with the word had to do with 70’s carpet and a term used in Austin Powers movies. Luckily I mentioned this to my girlfriend before I went with my initial impulse to slap his face. He just wanted to dance. LOL – oh and I’ve yet to learn the Shag … but it looks fun.

  54. That motif was very well maintained. Haha. I must confess. The ..ahh climax…was not what I expected. But no less satisfying.

  55. I learned to shag dance as a boy in Carolina.

    It is the only dance I know how to do. I did try doing the macarena a few times, but kept poking myself in the eye.

  56. Happy Birthday, and thank you for reading my post. I must be getting old as I only know two meanings of shag, one is a tobacco and the other is sexual. 🙂 I suppose it depends on which country you are in at the time.What`s called a bum bag in one country is a fanny pack in another, there is no such thing as an international language.:-) 🙂

  58. I am so glad you had the kaleidoscope of choices flowing on your blog, so I got to see you being quite silly, making a big joke about shagging and now, know why I love you! My oldest daughter is an Aries, March baby (3/29/80) Fun to check this out!

  59. I’m not going to lie, when I first began reading this entry, I thought you were talking about shagging, shagging, not shagging as in dancing. Ha. Needless to say, I enjoy the way you write and I find you to be very interesting; I’ve decided to follow your blog and I look forward to reading more about you and your life adventures, both big and small. Cheers!

    1. Most people of English descent believe I am talking about something I am not. 🙂

  60. I used to run shag bar up in NMB,heck I was in the movie. But I can t Shag either. I can appreciate a good one though…

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