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Dad Is Well Hung I Can’t Even Edition

I'm too busy laughing. I can't even write, Dear Reader. Have I told you how much I freaking LOVE you people? MTM and I both have new lines on our faces, etched there because YOU ARE SO FREAKING FUNNY. Don't believe me? Read on.

I’m too busy laughing. I can’t even write, Dear Reader. Have I told you how much I freaking LOVE you people? MTM and I both have new lines on our faces, etched there because YOU ARE SO FREAKING FUNNY.

Take this #DadIsWellHung entry from Jessie Powell.

i can't even

Dad wants to know what kind of toilet paper, Jessie. Because his hiney is delicate and sensitive, and he’s worried he may not have enough. AND he also asked…….”What’s them polka-dot things up there?”

Jessie is one of my favorite writers. Buy her books at Amazon HERE.

Washington’s Ted Strutz is a man after Dad’s lusty heart. I mean, just LOOK at this #DadIsWellHung submission…..

can't even

(Of course, I’m guilty of giving Ted the girly ornament, too……..) Check out Ted’s website HERE.

If Dad must go to work in Oregon, I guess he’s happiest when he’s leaning around…….

can't even

Dad would NOT say he’s well laid, Jim. Oh, the too-much-information I get whenever I call up there. Geez. Readers, look for Jim’s upcoming debut novel Ochoco Reach, debuting January 2016. I’ll remind you to buy it, but you can follow him on Twitter HERE.

And this one from Nancy Teixeira. CRYING. I’M CRYING.

can't even

Please forgive me for featuring Nancy two days in a row, but dang. SO FLIPPING FUNNY. And of course, there was reader Don Re’s Facebook quip: “Probably just selling books. Those poor ladies on the first floor…….”

I’ve got lots more entries to feature, but please keep them coming! I’m sharing them on social media, posting them to my Facebook Author Page, tagging my poor mother on Facebook and horrifying her to death, and generally laughing my pattotie off.

Still wondering what to do with Dad’s ball? ENTER THE #DadIsWellHung Contest!

  1. Post a photo of said gift on social media.
  2. Hashtag it #dadiswellhung.

That’s it! Every #dadiswellhung update will be entered to win the #DadIsWellHung Contest.

First Prize: A $25 gift card to Amazon/iTunes/Barnes and Noble (winner’s choice)

Second Prize: A $15 gift card to Amazon/iTunes/Barnes and Noble (winner’s choice)

Third Prize: A $10 gift card to Amazon/iTunes/Barnes and Noble (winner’s choice)

And to encourage creativity…..
A $25 gift card of choice will be awarded to
MOST CREATIVE #DadIsWellHung post!!!

The only rules for Most Creative?

  1. Post a photo of said gift on social media.
  2. Hashtag it #dadiswellhung.

So EVERYBODY can wow Dad with creative homages to his well-hung-ness. Come back tomorrow for a selection of our favorite #DadIsWellHung entries so far.

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12 Comments

  1. This has been fun. Maybe I’ll come up with another one. Stay tuned. (Tooned?)

  2. I continue to laugh – and right now I need it. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

  3. Ha! Tell him it’s Charmin extra soft, and the polka-dot-things are the wet wipes. For those times when squeezing the Charmin simply isn’t enough.

    1. Author

      THAT’S why Dad was clueless. He uses washcloths and towels. Multiple. And leaves them in the bathroom for future victims.

  4. Ah, so this is what Nancy’s tweets are about. Too funny, and very clever idea!

    I’m not getting email notifications of your posts. I found this through Twitter. Hmm, off to investigate. Maybe I need to refollow.

    1. Author

      Since I moved my site from .com to self-hosted, I’m not sure who’s getting what. Please let me know if the resubscribe fixes it.

  5. I will try to go at least a few days before my next tweets. 🙂

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